City of Grace (Kellys)

Who are all those hot people in the stands at Phillies games?

Okay, so the summer didn’t start out so well. Not only did the Phils get caught snitching signs; Matthew Clemmens made us the butt of gross spew jokes everywhere. Then there was Taser-gate, our Beer-Drinking Baby, and the Guy Falling Down the Stairs.

But — and I’m not the first to say this — the baseball season is a long one, and as the Phils began seriously stomping all comers, the crew at CBP turned a corner. We stopped groping women. We started making some amazing catches. We cheered for the Braves’ Matt Diaz after he ever so gently tripped an intruder on the field. Hey, we even finally got the hang of The Wave! And as I watched Carlos and Jayson and Ryan and Raul (go, Raul!) at the plate, I found myself increasingly distracted (it didn’t hurt that we kept blowing the Marlins out) by the … well, by the attractive faces behind them in the stands. Are these people really Philadelphians? I wondered. Not only are they pretty, but they seem so jovial, so good-natured, so lighthearted, so … the adjective Californian comes to mind. Sure, every now and again there’s a ringer. But I gotta say, damn, city, you look good! Stay classy through the post-season, will you? Except for you, Phanatic. We love you just the way you are.