Philadelphia Sex Diaries: I’m 77 and Having the Best Sex of My Life
When I lost my first husband, I was 58. We were married for 32 years. My daughter Debbie put me on a dating website. I was on that stupid Internet all the time because Debbie, she said to me, “You have to answer at least 10 to 20 ads a night, Mom.” I was working full-time and I was up until one o’clock in the morning answering these ads. I got all these crazy responses from young men looking for older women. Anyway, it got a little complicated. My family gave me a surprise 60th birthday party, and I brought one guy with me, Henry, and I walked into this party — it was at my own house — and two of the other guys I was dating were there, too. Debbie took me into the garage and said, “Who do you want to stay over tonight?”
Henry was from North Jersey. He was a pleasant chap, but he couldn’t really keep up with me. But with the sex, he was pretty good. He actually could not have an erection because he was on medicine for his heart, but he said, “I know how to please a woman.” And he was very good at it! He even bought me a dildo. I’d never had that before because my first husband, he was a gem, but he wasn’t very adventuresome. Henry, on the other hand, was willing to try anything.
The only thing is that he had ridges on his head. He had a beautiful head of white hair, but it was a turnoff because he had all these bumps. But he insisted that I had to touch his head, that it was a way to prove that I really loved him. I went out with him for nine months. He was a stepping-stone to others. It turned out to be really good that I had this experience. It gave me confidence.
I had a few other friendships. There was one guy who lives in Haddonfield who I liked a lot, but he was not the kind of guy to make a commitment, and he was so weird. He wanted to have sex, but he didn’t want to have intercourse — he just wanted to be able to have a climax and thought I should have a climax, but no penetration. He said it was too intimate.
And then I met Andy. He’s Italian, so he’s very demonstrative and sexy. My first husband never practiced cunnilingus on me because he was very conservative. And Andy never did, either, until recently — I don’t know what happened! But that’s a new adventure for me. And it was very pleasurable. You can tell all the people who are 77 and older that they should never give up.
So anyway, I’m married to Andy now. We went out on a Wednesday and he asked me out the following Friday, and we’ve been together ever since. We were married in Thailand, on a pineapple plantation. It was a surprise. I had no idea we were getting married, but Andy had arranged it all. It was crazy. Absolutely crazy. — As told to Emily Goulet
*Some names in this essay have been changed.
