He Said, She Said: Dressed Up With Nowhere To Go


It’s another edition of He Said, She Said, where Foobooz co-conspirators Kirsten Henri and Arthur Etchells wage IM war about a topic.

Today it’s about proper attire at the swanky Four Seasons. Should the way you’re dressed matter anymore? Is dressing up doomed or will Barney’s Co-Op save us all?

kirsthenri: so I took my mom to tea at the four seasons on saturday
kirsthenri: for a belated birthday thingee
foobooz: nice.
kirsthenri: it was
kirsthenri: pricy, but nice
kirsthenri: but here’s the thing

kirsthenri: it was 3:30 in the afternoon
kirsthenri: and we were in the lounge
kirsthenri: but still, it’s the four seasons
kirsthenri: and people were dressed like dirtballs
kirsthenri: like grungy old funky jeans, flip flops
kirsthenri: t-shirts
foobooz: Welcome to America.
kirsthenri: there were a few ladies in hats and like Easter suits
kirsthenri: but I would say the majority were slovenly
kirsthenri: although there was a guy in lime green pants
kirsthenri: I mean, I guess the thinking behind that is
kirsthenri: oh, I’m spending $15 on a drink, I should be able to wear what I want?
foobooz: well were they people staying at the hotel?
kirsthenri: I’m not sure
kirsthenri: does that make a difference
kirsthenri: ?
foobooz: Well yeah.
foobooz: If you’re going out for tea at the Four Seasons i’d expect you to dress up a bit.
foobooz: If you happen to be staying at the Four Seasons on a weekend I wouldn’t necessarily expect you to be dressed up if you just came in from walking around Center City.
kirsthenri: hmmm
kirsthenri: I think it’s a matter of respect
kirsthenri: for yourself and for the establishment
kirsthenri: why can’t you go up to your room and change into a pair of actual shoes?
kirsthenri: and a collared shirt or whatever?
kirsthenri: I mean, what is the point of the Four Seasons
kirsthenri: if you are going to be a slob while you’re there?
kirsthenri: nice things stop being nice if you don’t treat them nicely
foobooz: It’s a tough call. There’s something kind of fun about being underdressed in a nice place. It’s like you’re getting away with something.
kirsthenri: maybe this is b/c you’re a guy?
kirsthenri: Because I think there’s something fun about being dressed up in a nice place.
kirsthenri: It’s like you’re doing something special
foobooz: Well that’s true too.
kirsthenri: I’m surprised, Arthur
foobooz: But I can understand walking around all day and plopping your unwashed self in a big lounge seat at the Four Seasons and having a drink.
kirsthenri: yes
kirsthenri: true
foobooz: Not saying I wouldn’t get dressed up nicely for dinner or even later in that same lounge. Just saying there’s something about being the impromptu interloper in the ritzy set.
kirsthenri: yes, but if you’re either A) staying at the four seasons
kirsthenri: or B) it even occurs to you to plop down for a drink at the four seasons
kirsthenri: then you have enough money/style/savvy to at least know the difference between appropriate casual and dirtball casual
foobooz: And at the Four Seasons it’s kind of fun to be the dirtball, because you will still be treated well.
kirsthenri: well, that’s really the fine line, isn’t it?
kirsthenri: because the Four Seasons thing is all about catering to the guest
kirsthenri: putting the guest first, etc.
foobooz: And it is more than just dress.
foobooz: If I’m dressed like a dirtball and acting like a dirtball that’s different than
foobooz: being polite, cordial, leaving a good tip despite being dressed like I just got back from the Phillies game or something.
kirsthenri: that’s true
kirsthenri: but dressing appropriately is like the third leg of that tripod of being polite and leaving a good tip
kirsthenri: I mean, if it were up to me, everyone would be dress like they were in The Thin Man at all times
kirsthenri: I know I’m probably a little on the extreme side
foobooz: Yeah, I’d say you are.
kirsthenri: but if it’s okay to wear flipflops at the Four Seasons
foobooz: It’d be ok to wear them at the White House like Northwestern’s women’s lacrosse team did?
kirsthenri: no way
kirsthenri: those girls should have been waterboarded by the ghost of Jackie Kennedy
kirsthenri: why don’t we all just start peeing in the plants while we’re there too?
foobooz: There’s a big difference between the two.
kirsthenri: also, to be fair, you are on the extreme other side
foobooz: I’m a constant plant urinator?
kirsthenri: hahahahah
kirsthenri: no
kirsthenri: I mean you are less likely to want to get dressed up
kirsthenri: you had to put a facebook status up the last time you wanted to shop for a dressy outfit, if I remember correctly
foobooz: Well that was an odd description of the dress code.
kirsthenri: what was it?
kirsthenri: oh, Union Trust… cocktail attire.
kirsthenri: it was dressy, right?
foobooz: But I came through with a fine ensemble complete with lavender shirt that I enjoyed wearing.
kirsthenri: yes, you looked very nice
kirsthenri: but it does prove my point
kirsthenri: you were perplexed by the dress code
foobooz: I wasn’t alone.
kirsthenri: Goodtimes does not count
foobooz: I’m perplexed by his dresscode.
kirsthenri: you should be.
kirsthenri: um, dude
kirsthenri: the invite said ‘cocktail attire’
kirsthenri: that is a standard dress thing
foobooz: ok. So I don’t get invited to many cocktail attire required events.
foobooz: Sniffle.
kirsthenri: hahahahah
kirsthenri: that’s not your fault, that’s Philly’s fault
kirsthenri: people are against getting dressed up here
kirsthenri: which brings us right back where we started
foobooz: Or propbably any place not named Miami, NY or LA.
kirsthenri: well, judging from What Not To Wear
kirsthenri: the women of Seattle are way more sartorially challenged than we are here
kirsthenri: so I guess that’s comforting
kirsthenri: I guess if Georges Perrier can give up his formal dining stuff
kirsthenri: there’s really no hope
kirsthenri: I should just break out my sweatpants and be done with it
foobooz: Yeah I think so. It’s rare that people dress up. It’s more like sometimes we play dress-up.
kirsthenri: I refuse to give in
kirsthenri: suck it, flip-flop wearers
foobooz: Well we have a Barney’s Co-op now. Maybe things will change.
kirsthenri: it’s the attitude, not the access
foobooz: True.
kirsthenri: I wonder what The People think?
kirsthenri: let’s put it to them

Swann Lounge at the Four Seasons [Official Site]