Even Obama’s Dog Shills for His Campaign

When it comes to choosing the leader of the free world, I base my decision on the things that really matter: willingness to be bear-hugged and cuteness of pets. Since Mitt Romney definitely loses that battle—is the man even allowed to have a pet after what happened to poor Seamus?—Obama has my vote. (His views on women’s rights help, too.) Just like any other resident of the White House, Bo Obama, a cuddly Portuguese water dog, is a straight-up celebrity, complete with his own ever-growing list of merchandise. Though Bo slacks in the bootleg T-shirt situation—an area where his master has more than enough options—he makes up for it with originality. (Who buys a life-size cutout of a the president’s dog? If it’s you, please tell me.) Peep photos of that plus nine other wacky Bo Obama products below.

Golf Club Covers: Even if you’re not the best golfer at the country club, you can impress on the greens.

Doggie T-Shirts: Aww, this is pretty cute. Tacky as hell. But also cute.

Wall Decals: Well, it’s cheaper than fine art, that’s for sure.

Business Cards: Endorsed by the First Dog? You’re hired!

Buttons: This product would actually be all right if it didn’t imply that Bo is a giant beast-dog who can eat a half dozen humans.

Car Magnets: Dogs can’t drive cars! Humans shouldn’t bark! This is so confusing.

Life-size Cutout: Seriously, I cannot fathom who would buy this. (If it’s you, please send me a photo at epalan@phillymag.com.)

Tote Bag: Bo knows what exactly? Is it who killed J.F.K.?

Comic book: See, kids, reading is fun!

Golf Shirt: Just in case your Bo Obama golf club cover didn’t give away your political affiliation.